In the last week of November 2011, Eurostat – which, funnily enough, collates statistics about Europe – declared that women in the UK are the fattest in Europe. At time of writing, 23.9% of women in the UK were obese. For the mathematically challenged that’s nearly a quarter (if you had four cakes one of those would equal a quarter). So it’s official: the fat woman is a British Icon.
How did it come to this? We at you2uk.com have carried out absolutely no research and come to the baseless conclusion: it’s New Labour’s fault.
Back in the rosy days before 1997, when people used to work for a living, the British were a svelte nation, noted for wiry women. Thin ladies like Kate Moss, Jody Marsh and 1960’s model Twiggy were the norm. Women like TV’s Dawn French and Hattie Jacques from the Carry On films were the exception. Then Tony Blair got voted in.
Suddenly, there were no consequences legal or otherwise for one’s actions. Benefits were handed out left, right and centre. No one needed to work. Factories churned out high-fat, low-cost food at the behest of Gordon Brown. Twenty-four hour TV gave those signed off sick from work something to do whilst sitting on their arses.
As people got larger so did their confidence in not having to do anything to reel in their bulging waistlines. The Human Rights Act 1998 and chat shows like Tricia, Oprah and The Jeremy Kyle Show gave women all the excuses they needed not to get down the gym. ‘Big is beautiful’ they cried as fat birds with platforms in magazines convinced the weak-minded it was fine to increase the risk of diabetes, heart disease and spinsterdom rather than shun cakes or do some exercise.
While all this was going on, a couple of elastic waistbands stowed-away on a ship from Florida. When the ship docked at Liverpool, they scampered down the ropes and began to breed. Soon they had infiltrated trousers in the George line at Asda. The die was cast. Big clothes for big women were here to stay. And what did New Labour do? They invaded Iraq, that’s what!
Fat Women of Europe
United Kingdom 23.9%
Fat Men of Europe
The thing is, it’s not okay to be obese. For one thing, as mentioned above, it’s bad for your health. The list of obesity-related health problems is exhaustive. This in turn puts a strain, in more ways than one, on the National Health Service. But the main thing is girls, despite what some people might say, it just doesn’t look nice.
Dawn French, Fern Britten and even that ex-fat Welsh bird off Gavin and Stacey, have all slimmed down and all look great. Doubtless they feel healthier and happier too. The thing about losing weight is that it takes a little bit of effort. New Labour’s cash injections and soft policy made ‘effort’ a dirty word in the UK. Now obesity should be. Tell it like it is: it’s not obese, it’s fat!
Fat Women are sadly a British Icon.
British Icons / Fat Women